random happy photos

happy graduation michelle

Today, my cousin, Michelle graduated from high school.

CONGRATULATIONS
Michelle and the Class of 2006!!!

happy birthday Uncle Bob!

Birthday wishes to my Uncle Bob,

the amazing family chef!

Enjoy your special day!

this boy makes me happy

my little nephew, TJ, who looks just like my baby brother --

he's too cute and adorable!

thanks theo for the latest photos...i love them all!

celebrating legends with the LTC

Last night, a few friends came on over for Oprah's Legends Ball. We watched the show together while enjoying each other's company and chocolate chip cookies. Thanks for making it a memorable evening!

some of the legends in training club (LTC) with their youngins:

1 - shari and sara, 2 - cathy and sophia, 3 - ginger and amaya

not pictured yet: janice, michelle, ted and i

happy birthday lanie lay

Happy Birthday Elaine a.k.a. Cuzzy E!

It was so nice to see you on Sunday afternoon. Hope your day is special...although it seems like your weekend already was!

Who's Lanie? Check out her myspace at http://www.myspace.com/luvaluva74.

weekend

reflecting on the presentation i witnessed on thursday by dick martin, retired pr exec from AT&T:

three words to remember in pr --

JUDGEMENT

CREATIVITY

INTEGRITY

"Being in Public Relations means that you can never say I told you so."

"Experience comes from what you do. Wisdom comes from what you do badly."

spent saturday jilling the first half and then left for jacksonville. had dinner with keith, dee, ted, teddy and tori. excellent company after the drive down 95.

visited the lay's on sunday! so good to see them and give them hugs before their birthdays. this is a big week for the family...elaine and bob's birthdays, michelle's graduation, tj's turning 4 months old!

as i continue to became aware of why life is so meaningful, i find that in every moment there is a great reason to celebrate.

having fun!

my favorite BRIAN

BRIAN is the one on the left...he and shari are such ANGELS
had a great lunch with a great guy today who will one day be married to his great girl. i'm so excited for him and look forward to keeping in touch with him. he is the coolest (even though he graduated from boone)!

go brian, go!

2 cents on leaving the comfort zone

by Suzanne Falter Barns

Here are a few things I've determined that might help when stepping outside of your comfort zone:

1. Don't look back.
On bad days, the temptation is strong to look back at the old, safe little world and wish you hadn't leapt. But you did leap, of course, and so now must work within that bigger circle. Hindsight just gives you a headache, so don't indulge. It won't help your cause.

2. Enjoy the view you do have.
Think about the expanding number of people who will be affected or helped by what you are offering the world. No matter what sort of work you provide, it will help others on some level. So keep your focus on that..

3. Start envisioning a bigger, better you.
When I first started working with a coach, I told her I wanted to be someone who wore 'bigger shoes'. Somehow the image of bigger shoes helped me connect to the sort of impact I wanted to have in the world. Pick a concrete image for yourself -- something tangible, no matter how silly it seems -- that will help you envision a larger, more generous you.

4. Keep remembering how little you know.
The game in the land of thinking big is NOT to know how to do everything in advance. Instead, it is to stretch your ability to try things, and to follow your instinct. Your instinct is actually a far better guide than any instruction book you can ever find, and will generally steer you right whenever you listen to it.
It's also important to learn how to fail with grace, for just about every day there will be some kind of failure or frustration. By not having to know how to do everything at the outset, or having to do it perfectly, you can open yourself up to trying more and more challenging things.

5. Remember ... it's only a game.
Yes, you may have some personal investment in thinking big. You may have large sums of money tied up in your dream, or have made the mistake of talking it up with doubting relatives who are now waiting for you to blow it, big time.

However, this does not mean that your entire self-worth as a person is connected to your results. Instead, hold this grand experiment as a game, and you will have a much easier time of it. Games, after all, are fun ... and as we all know, fun is where the true power is in life. So go ahead. Step outside the circle by turning thoughts into action. Believe it or not, you do know exactly what to do.

still walking

so, last night i played soccer. i've been on a 3 week break since i hurt my knee. we had no subs and were down one player and we still played really well. we lost to the first team in the league by 1 goal. we were awesome!

summer sisters

last night, i tried something new. i went to a neighborhood book club. i was invited by my friend suzanne from wesh. we started talking months ago about the connection that gets missed in every day life. she valued her book clubs, she's a member of two, and how it makes a group of people get together and discuss their views on not only the book but their life. it's a very revealing process but it's good for the soul. i left feeling a part of something that didn't have a lot of rules except just show up and participate. my only regret is that i didn't read the entire book -- Summer Sisters by Judy Blume -- but i did find myself contributing anyway. (so unlike me, i know) they have a nice system that rotates the location and the one who chooses the book. the person who hosts, picks the book and kind of gets things going when everyone sits down to discuss it. they meet once a month and not only discuss book stuff, but also neighborhood gossip. that was my least favorite part. i really came to talk about the book and to see how it all works. i realize that in most social settings -- structured or not, you've got to have that time. the time to catch up and get the latest from those you've grown close but haven't seen in weeks. it's a nice dynamic and one that i'm glad i got to experience.

Summer Sisters by Judy Blume

Everybody's talking about Judy Blume!"The emotional connection a person can form with one true friend can be the mostformative experience in a person's life. In Summer Sisters, Judy Blume explores the friendship that spans 18 years in the lives of two women and the lasting effect this relationship has on both ofthem....Summer Sisters is her first foray into adult fiction in nearly 15 years, and it is well worth the wait....Blume creates a rich tapestry of characters, revealing all the hidden emotions lying beneath the surface. Summer Sisters is an exceptionally moving story that can leave the reader laughing and crying at various points, sometimes at the same time. Blume's talent lies in creating characters you can see yourself in, and, hopefully, we won't have to wait another 15 years for her to delve into the adult landscape again."--The Denver Post

fail to prevail

ran into a girl from high school today at a new restaurant, sandra, who played soccer for two years at CHS. last night, at janice's birthday dinner, i ran into Otis Smith, who just got promoted to GM of the Orlando Magic. then, behind us was John Morgan, who ate dinner with us. He is so "for the people" with his black amex card. at least that's what our server said.

i walked down to the library in the rain and thought i was going to have lunch with shannon but she wasn't there. it was nice to be out in the rain though. if you read my previous blog about rain break then you'd know why. this time, i did have a nice umbrella.

words that start with F: yesterday, i took a huge test and came away feeling pretty cruddy about the way i did. of course, i really won't know until i get the results which will hopefully be before the end of this week. this is one of those moments where if i failed, i failed and i have to just be ready to try again. in the process of getting to feeling ready, i'm just feeling the possibility. then, i keep telling myself..."well, at least you took the test!" what's the saying? it's not whether you win or lose but how you play the game. i don't think it totally applies here but for those who know me, i know you're impressed that i used it. everyone who loves me continues to remind me that i did fine but i just can't help but trust my gut on this one. i guess to prolong the torture, i can't wait until i get the results. maybe they lost them and they'll never arrive. then FAIL won't be acknowledged and if it's not then it never really happened.

Happy Birthday to Janice and Aunt Maureen!

Today I celebrate Janice and Maureen!

email surprise - random happy photos - old school

thanks to a former fellow straw hat player, Michael Maguire,

i received these photos in my email today.

wow! how crazy are these pictures from 1990!

holding hands

this weekend i sat with my mother-in-law, Trish Johnson. i held her hand most of the afternoon yesterday and part of today. i was so relieved to discover that her hand had so much strength and so much to say. her right side is very weak but her left is where she is most responsive. i sat and watched her yesterday and i kept wondering what she was thinking, what she was feeling. are you in pain? are you upset? are you afraid? are you even aware of what is happening to you? from the touch of her hand, i felt normalcy. i felt something familiar. i felt the trish that would say my name a certain way when i walked into the room or when she answered the phone. her hand gave me a sign that she's still here and she still loves me. her hand made me know that she is not lost, but rather, trying to find her way to letting everyone know that she's okay. from the touch of her hand, i felt her life.

the doctor's are not sure how much time she has left with us. she is no longer on any treatment and is being visited by hospice daily. i want to scream -- "don't die, don't die...PLEASE!! DON'T DIE!" What can I do? What can I do to stop what's happening to her?

even though her hand, her life, was in mine, i still miss her. i want her to be able to come and visit us in our home. i want to know what she's up to. i need her to keep coordinating all of us and making sure all of the finer details are taken care of. i long for her to call me and let me know how she's doing and who she's hanging out with for the weekend. i want to watch her and ted share a kiss in the kitchen after preparing a meal together for us all day. i want to see her and millie decorate the house together. i wish she could of taught me and teddy how to make her spanikopita. i need her to take the next good book i read off my hands for awhile and then talk to me after she's done reading it about what she liked and didn't like. i want her to just know that all her worries and frustrations were going to be okay.

all around their house, there are beautiful orchids. what i've learned since i have had a few in my home is that sometimes the blooms come in great strength and while their there, you love to enjoy what they represent -- beauty, growth, amazingness. then, they begin to fall, one by one until you're left with a stem. it's the same stem that brought about the beautiful and amazing growth but it needs to start over again. i've been unsuccessful in bringing any blooms back with my own orchids and i remember Trish saying the same thing about hers. it saddens me because i know the possibility that lies in that stem but i don't know what to do to make it feel better so that it will bloom in full strength again.

childhood bestfriend

Happy Birthday Tina!

GO GATORS!

She's the only one I would do that for because ever since we were five years old, the girl has bled orange and blue.

here's a photo Tina coordinated with her brothers (Daniel, Dennis and Jonathan)

as a Mother's Day gift for Sandy.

how sweet is that?

they are all who i used to play with when i was growing up.

me talk pretty

I was reading a great article written by Sally Kempton the other day about the power of words in an article called Me Talk Pretty:

Words and the energy they carry make or break friendships and careers; they define us as individuals and even as cultures. The unnecessary speaking that takes place and how it wastes energy, energy that could otherwise be devoted to prayer, self-inquiry or transformative action. More important, is the power that words have to change the communal atmosphere, to cause joy or pain, and to create a climate that fosters truth or falsity, kindness or cruelty. So much of the pain we cause ourselves and each other could be avoided if we were just a bit more discriminating about what we say. WORDS create reality. Before speaking, ask yourself the following three questions:

IS THIS TRUE?

IS IT KIND?

IS IT NECESSARY?

These questions are the three gates of speech. Remembering to ask them will at least give you pause, and that pause can be enough to hold back torrents of trouble.

Speak from a place of awareness. Whenever you start to complain, take a moment to be quiet and still, and pay attention to your heart. Then, wait and see what words come from that silent place. Most always it will be something unexpected and wise.

Use speech that can change and inspire the world, that resonates at the highest level of contact with your silent place behind words, the place we reach when we're able to pause, turn into the heart and let the stillness speak through our words. Speech that comes out of stillness is speech that comes, literally, from the source of wisdom itself.

rain break

Receive the present moment -- pleasant or unpleasant -- just as it is.

new co-workers took me out to lunch today and instead of having a nice stroll back to the office, it was raining so hard i could barely see where i was stepping. james and jeff didn't have heels on either so i stood in front of a building contemplating whether i should continue the torture of soaking myself or if i should just stay in front of the building until the rain passed. of course, i chose to go for it and everything was drenched.

later tonight, i was pulling into where i live and lo and behold, another strike of rain comes rushing down right when i was about to get out of the car. what's with the rain and me today?

i couldn't help but be upset but then i remembered the people across town who have been dealing with fires because of how dry it's been. i remembered how one of my favorite things to do back in the day was to play in the rain. this week has been hectic and it's not emptying into a nice relaxing weekend. in fact, the weekend, will be more difficult than my week. in moments like today, when the rain is coming down on me so hard and all i can do is question "why" because i've got a million things to do and this shouldn't be happening to me, i am reminded of how i need to take a rain break. it's different from a "rain check", a rain break requires a break from it all and to just let the water fall over me and feel something so that i don't miss my moments, the precious ones, they're not forever but only for that second. like the raindrops, they are always falling, wherever i go.

random happy photos

how can it be?

Today and every day, I celebrate how much I love Mr. Wonderful and how much my love for him continues to grow each and every day.

remember them

they need your prayers right now and your support through a very difficult time. remember them. remember trish johnson and her family that surrounds and wants to do the best thing possible for her.

Happy Birthday to two beautiful women!

my mommy glow





my friend, shari

slice of life and savoring every bite

Sometimes SILENCE is the best answer.

When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

When you LOSE, don't LOSE the lesson.

In disagreements, deal only with the current situation.

Don't bring up the past.

Three R's to REMEMBER:

R espect for self
R espect for others
R esponsibility for all your actions


I could write a novel after each one of these statements based on experiences, examples both bad and good and how the world operates according to my perception. Take the first one, "Sometimes SILENCE is the best answer." Sometimes you just know nothing you say will make a difference to another person. No matter how much they try to control and manipulate a situation, you just know if you give a glimpse of trust to them, they will abuse it which is a great segue into "When you lose, don't lose the lesson." Through loss, you find truth and you find something closer to what you are which is opposite to what you're deciding to let go of. To choose something that no longer accepts you, that wants you to be and act like something you're not is a sure way to lose your essence, your uniqueness, what makes you special. I was talking to an old friend, an old soul today and through our conversation we realized that we just don't have time to waste on living life outside of who we are because before you know it you're diagnosed with brain cancer and losing the ability to function in every day life. None of us know when or what it will be. It's such a cliche, but the meaning is so universal. That brings me to the three R's -- Respect for self, Respect for others, Responsibility for all your actions. All are easy to talk about but at times, very difficult to do. If we respect ourselves, we respect other people. Typically, disrespect is a direct result of someone acting out because they don't respect who they are. Responsibility -- now that's a good one. I recently experienced firsthand how convenient responsibility and the choice to take it can happen. A person decides that to get out of something, they forget to take responsibility for what they did. It's a cop out and a cowardly way to deal with life or people that you claim to love, to think of as family. I know they can't help it because they've never done anything different. I can no longer choose to be okay with that because then I would be disrespecting who I am striving to be. The sad part of it all is people who lack responsibility will never find true joy or happiness. Part of finding joy, is being able to acknowledge your weaknesses and what makes you human. If you consistently live in world where it is always their fault, not yours, you are missing out on you, the real you. "When you make a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it." There's that third "R" again. And, if you don't agree with someone do the following -- "Deal with the current situation, don't bring up the past." To do this, you have to know that by harping on what once was, you are not going to move forward. The majority of what surrounds us all, moves forward -- time, nature, the wind, birds...so why can't we? What an amazing force we'd all become if we would just let go and go forth without reservation or what once was holding us back? Open your arms to living and just fly...Awe yes, now, that's life!

in mind

If you reveal your secrets to the wind, you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees.
??

other loralei

Find your Joy and cherish it.

The journal entry below reminds me of my old journal as a teenager -- thoughts by my 13 year old mind:

Joy's in town for a conference so last night I picked her up and we headed to my place for some serious Gilmore Girls viewing. We started by stopping for a delicious slurpee which strangely, are not available in Georgia. What's wrong with them peoples? I talked to her momma for a minute. Her voice always lifts my spirits. We ran into Ted on our way into the neighborhood. We began viewing past episodes from the last few weeks while Ted worked his magic in the Johnson Curry Kithen. The stuff is wonderful and makes my mouth water just thinking about it! Since Joy was starving, I brought out the "fancy" cheese and crackers with sliced cherry tomatoes and served it all up with a smile. I guess I can confess that during the curry prep., I took a bite of the saag paneer. Shame on me! Last night's episode left you hanging and wanting more since Loralei admitted to her mother that things were not happening with her and Luke. This mention came after her mother went on and on about a house she wanted to buy them as a wedding present. Oh, what a tragedy! Why can't they just get married and have "heated discussions" like everyone else? Rory and Logan seem okay but it makes me wonder with his family and all if things will ever work out. Okay, so obviously I love the Gilmore Girls and can't wait for the Season Finale! For Ted's sake, we went ahead and watched American Idol too before taking Joy back to her hotel. As usual, I agreed with Simon on a lot of his comments. Chris is a hottie and a mini Vin Diesel. Gotta love Vin!

Joy and I's fave line this Gilmore season -- "Oh my gosh, Jackson's so getting under my bra tonight!"

Thanks Joy for listening to the other stuff...It's all part of my process on learning how and why things like that happen.

choose something positive

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?" Actually, who are you not be? You are a child of God.

Your playing small doesn't serve the world.

There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Today I walked through an immigration march in downtown Orlando while trying to get back to my office. I didn't really get what they were yelling in spanish as thousands of people walked past me but I got that they were feeling strong because they had each other. I was moved by the togetherness. When something is important to you, you tend to rally your friends and get them involved in whatever it is. It can be something as small as where to go for lunch or as big as a walk for world peace. Either way, you stand for something stronger, when you have other people there holding your hand and cheering you on. It's important to remember this as you're "word vomiting" about something or someone you don't like. We have a choice, it's such a powerful one, to either be something positive or be something negative in the world. I wrote a few posts ago about ridding yourself of toxic people, I guess I just want to make sure that I'm not one of them.

Happy Easter (Greek style)!

I just appreciated today because of the love, the celebration and the overall sense that through anything, we can make it if we stay together.

Imperial Dynasty strikes again!

Ted and I were invited by Tony and Kathy to their employee appreciation party where they were celebrating 5 years of business, Chinese New Year and expressing appreciation to their VIP customers and employees. What a great time we all had hanging out, singing karoake (I did it, of course), watching Hula dancers and meeting new people.

welcome to the 40's theo #2

Happy 40th Theo!

I LOVE THEO

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BROTHER!

strength

I write to taste life twice.
-Anais Nin

I find my self heading into such an incredibly good direction because I am surrounded by people that I can learn so much from who are strong and cabable and not afraid to do what they do best -- be themselves. How many times has opportunity been wasted on trying to be something else or someone else to make other people comfortable and happy with themselves?

Lost tonight on the pitch (as J. Brown would say). Played a hard game of football (also what J. Brown would say) since we were down a girl. It's great when the opposite team enjoys playing you, not just because we seem to be a sure win, but because we're fun. Ginger's family was there which made me extra happy for Ginger since I know it means a lot to her and plus, she played a good game!!! ;-)

I rode in Rei's 2005 convertible Red Mustang today. It was so worth the hair style going out the window...Literally! I thought it was great to just sit back and let the weather that us Floridians brag about just surround me. Florida -- where oranges happen and better known as, THE SUNSHINE STATE.

Today I know that there is love...His love that is all around us. God has placed some wonderful people in my life who encourage me and who I enjoy encouraging. It's a mutual respect minus the drama, the pretending, the negativity. It's about resolution and peace and comfort in why God didn't create just two people to be here on this planet but so many to create connections with and to better experience His amazing grace.

had a BRIGHT day

Sometimes our light goes out but is blown into flame by another human being. Each of us owes deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this light.
-Albert Schweitzer

First day at the House. Lots to learn. It's a quiet setting and strange to be in an office that doesn't have anything in the file cabinets or desk. The good thing is that I get to fill it with whatever I want...It's totally a fresh start. Does this mean I get to order a brand new stapler? Nothing like new office supplies.

Our greatest duty and our main duty is to help others, and please, if you can't help them, would you please not hurt them?
-Dalai Lama

Went to Monday night YOGA and ran into several people tonight. I thought about today in comparison to my first few months at the gym. I didn't know anyone. I would go to class and i would leave. Now, I can barely leave the place on time because of the people I've met and now with Alisha, Mary and Karen there, it's so great to see them.

People change and forget to tell each other.
- Lillian Hellman

I can't get over how cute my husband is...He makes me laugh and cooks too!

big day

I just noticed that I have several entries that are still marked as drafts, mainly about Europe and that distant thing called childhood. Things have just been happening so fast, I can hardly keep it all written before another thing is on the horizon. I am grateful because I truly feel life at its fullest and that is bigger than any blog or journal can hold.

So, in keeping with this thought of not having enough time to record great things, I have to mention my time in Savannah with Joy. She is simply amazing and has taken the time to write a little something on her blog -- www.fairytalesandfireflies.blogspot.com. If you want to see a big part of my heart, visit Joy. She is someone who is so beyond her years and yet has the enthusiasm of a child on Christmas morning about God and what He is doing in her life. If you check it soon, you may come across some sketches from our trip. Funny stuff! Although Joy is really good at draw-rings. Next stop: Oregon. Joy, just know that I'd settle for a cardboard box in your backyard because you're that fun to be around.

Tonight, I've got heartbreak on the mind. A friend of mine just recently experienced great loss with someone who they had put their entire being into...This was the one. Well, the one turned out to be a stranger at the end, someone unrecognizable when all was said and done. How does this happen? How does someone you've grown close to and trusted become someone you can't bear the thought of being around because the risk is too great? The heart can only take so much. Life is too short to be afraid and LOVE is too necessary to not have it flowing in every relationship, authentic relationship, not the kind that's built on convenience or guilt.

I just started reading "A Literate Passion, Letters of Anais Nin and Henry Miller." It is so far one of those books you just feel stronger owning because of the intensity of the writing and the relationship. Two talented, yet torn individuals who found each other because they were born with the same passion -- to write and share it with the world.

It was six years ago today that I realized Ted and I would be together and the rest is history. Sometimes love finds you even when you're not looking...

transition week

LIFE IS SHORT. LIVE IT UP.

Saturday/Sunday - Savannah with Joy
Sunday/Monday - Jacksonville with Ted and Trish, lunch at Hala's
Monday - Jillin' with Deb
Tuesday - sorting and Jacksonville with Michelle in the new "Not a mom car"
Wednesday - Melbourne with Tracy (ART FEST April 22-23) and soccer game (we tied 2-2)
Dinner with JoAnn (love love her and her ability to be wherever I am)
Call from Silent Rob - my new found philosopher friend
Thursday - still deciding for the day, Step Aerobics, Chinese at ID with good friends (can't wait)
Friday - Gringo going to the vet AGAIN and stopping by the new office for paperwork, Lunch with Rob, YOGA
Saturday - possibly heading to the beach or something outdoors
Sunday - jillin' all day

my joy

Thank you Joy :-)

I had such a wonderful time in Savannah!