when you sit down and really think about how to go about solving a problem, things become so clear. first and foremost, figure out what the problem is. many times, we mistake a problem without really understanding the source. what's really going on here? am i upset about the dishwasher being broken or am i just stressed because i know that i'll have to figure out how to fix it like i do with everything else and in the meantime, it's going to take away from my already piled up list of to do's that i try and stay on top of daily? to dig even deeper -- i am really upset about being stressed and not having enough time to do everything. so once the problem is identified, i begin to think of possible solutions: i can fix it. i can try to get ted to fix it. i can choose not to fix it and handwash the dishes. i can go ahead and get a whole new dishwasher.
so those potential solutions are a good start. from here, i pick one that seems most reasonable. maybe it doesn't work so instead of trying to bang my head against the wall and do the whole thing again, i try something else. this time, it almost works but not quite the way i thought it would. so, again, i look at another possible option and just for the sake of brevity of this post, it works! the dishwasher is now in working condition. i feel much better because i have time to do something else and i move forward happily to the next thing on the list.
when it comes to problems, i think of how many times i forget this simple exercise of just understanding what's really going on and then taking the time to come up with some viable solutions. now, not every problem or as some would say, challenges for growth, extend the luxury of time to figure it out thoroughly but when it does, instead of jumping in and possibly making it harder, try and remember to take some time. to stop. to breathe and to regroup. to think about it and for a lot of us women out there -- to talk about it. then, most importantly, begin working on solutions. even more importantly, MOVE FORWARD! when faced with something similar in the future, know what worked and what didn't. try to stay the course of being able to see the many problems that come our way on a regular basis and how it's a way to stretch ourselves and challenge our abilities to know that we can make it through anything. i mean, anything! to encourage and reinforce that, look closely at some of the people who surround us. think about some of their obstacles that they endured which ended up being what brought them to us as a friend or to a better place in life. think about the difficulties that you've experienced personally and how being on the other side of them sheds light on how strong the human spirit is and how by choosing to move forward, any one of us can face whatever it is knowing that there's hope because we're alive.